People always say traveling will change you. It will make you realize things you never thought would ever notice, it will help you discover some parts of yourself that you’ve always been in denial about. Parts of you that you’ve tried hard to conceal. All the heightened emotions that a person feels when traveling somehow makes you see life in a different way.
It has become a yearly tradition to take a trip abroad with one of our favorite shoe brands ever, YOSI SAMRA. Our first one being in Bali then in Hanoi and just recently, we took our biggest trip to date together, 6 cities all in 15 days. We went to Paris, Budapest, Porto, Malta, Santorini and Athens and all the experiences we had easily made it one of our most memorable projects :) We landed in Paris and spent the next 4 days exploring parts of the city we’ve never seen before. This is my 3rd time in a span of one year but the city has this magic that makes you fall inlove with it over and over again. It feels familiar but as you walk the streets, you would realize that there’s more to love about the place :)
My first visit to Europe was in December of 2016 and Paris was my first stop. Looking back at the year that passed since then, a lot has changed with me as a person. Its amazing what 365 days can do. I can’t pinpoint when I exactly entered in to this what they call “quarter life crisis” or even if it was really what I did go through but just like any other phase, it started with denial. I noticed that I’ve become moody and stressed for no reason. What patience I had for waiting before started to disappear and I felt like I easily got overwhelmed when responsibilities were thrown at my lap. I thought maybe it was exhaustion talking, maybe all the different time zones finally caught up to me. Next was I started to question what I was doing. I just read the blogpost that I wrote about this and while I did sound like I had hope back then, I was only in the early stages. I felt like I wasn’t right for the industry, like maybe what I’m doing wasn’t meant for me anymore and I started to think about all the other options I had just in case I did want to stop this. I had all these wild plans of wanting to move to another place, maybe to go back to school, take a corporate job, you name it.
Then I started to feel discontented, it wasn’t that I wasn’t enough anymore but what was happening to me wasn’t enough anymore. I started to see past the blessings that were given to me and saw them as a burden. Then I started to lash out on other aspects of my life. I started to get so annoyed with the smallest things about my relationship with Ben. I just kept wanting more from him without trying harder myself. I started to take it out on Verniece and started to act like a boss when our relationship was supposed to be a partnership. After that climax of emotions, I started to become complacent. I shrugged all my feelings aside, accepted more work, acted normal with Ben and just did everything mediocrely. I wasn’t depressed or anything but I knew I wasn’t happy. This went on for weeks until Verniece and I took that trip to Europe, just the two of us.
All that alone time with Verniece gave me a chance to reflect. To act out my emotions. It was after that trip that I realized how amazing Verniece is of a human being. Her patience for me was just so inspiring. lol On that 15 day trip together, I got to think about what I really wanted to do. If what I was feeling was just a phase or if I really wanted to quit everything and start anew. Then I came home and had about a month in between my trip with YOSI SAMRA. Right when I got back from that trip, I felt like I had unconsciously hit the pause button on my progress as I started to go back to my routine. Finally, I left for Paris and came home with an answer to my question: This is just you growing up. I realized that what happened to me was a wake up call. I’ve been blogging for 8 years now and doing something for that long, no matter how exciting, sort of becomes a routine. It’s inevitable. God was just so good to me because he didn’t teach me a lesson by taking it away from me to make me realize what I had. I imagined what my life would be like if I stopped blogging and I realized that if that happened, I would really be unhappy, it wasnt just going to be a phase because this is what I was meant to do. God carved my path to get me to here in this part of my life because this is where I’m meant to be, this is where I’m meant to excel. It was a month of healing for me and I’m very thankful that I’m ending the year with fresher eyes of what I have in life.
You see every person has a different quarter life experience but I know that every one goes through it. Some may not even realize that it’s happening to them or that it already happened but I wanted to share with you the lessons I learned from what I experienced.
1. It’s okay to feel this way. Nope, you’re not going crazy, you’re not being ungrateful nor you’re being a brat. This is your transition period. This is your chance to think about what you really want to do in life. This may be God speaking to you whether you really want to be in the relationship you’re in and not for the wrong reasons or if you’re really happy with your job or you’re just doing it for someone else or something else. This is your chance to reflect and think about that.
2. Remember that your lfe isn’t crumbling down but instead it’s you that is. Your loved ones still love you and your relationships are probably still going great. The most crucial thing I learned aside from the one above is that I realized that once you stop being unhappy with yourself, you would start to become unhappy with the other relationships you have. Once you’ve healed, you would realize that it was you and your mindset all along!
2. Don’t mind what other people say and surround yourself with supportive people. I’ve always believed that my biggest blessings in life are the people around me. My parents have always been supportive of me and when I did talk to my mom bout this, she assured me that whatever I decide to do, she’ll be behind me. When I asked my dad if I can quit blogging and study abroad, he said that I may regret it but he’ll support it because I never know what could be out there for me. My siblings always tried to give me answers and we girls know that when we’re going through a problem, any answer would help. Ben was very patient and supportive of me and those were always two qualities I loved about him. You guys, my readers, were always there to reassure me that my best is enough. You might not have noticed it but you are a big part of why it wasn’t as hard to go through it. Talk about it as much as you want because it helps, talk to all ages especially people who know better than you.
3. Don’t make hash decisions. Just because you thought about it one emotional night, don’t quit your job. Sleep on it, then sleep on it again. Think about it long and hard. Don’t just quit your job, break up with your boyfriend or move to another country but do it like this: Imagine how your life will be without whatever you’re unsure about and if your heart tells you that you’ll be happier then go for it.
4. Weigh the cons and pros. Remember, this is a big life decision. Better be sure!
5. If you’ve thought about it long and hard and you’ve decided to make that change, just do it. It will be scary at first I can assure you that and people will probably say you did the wrong thing but remember this, look back at all the amazing things that happened in your life, they felt like this at first right? .
6. If it doesn’t work out how you imagined it, it’s okay because this is all part of a bigger plan. Life is about hit and misses, as long as you made the decision with your mind and heart, the important thing is you tried it and it was YOUR decision. You will not live with ifs and instead, you when you look back at this moment 20 years from now, you will realize that where you are won’t happen if you didn’t make this decision.
All the shoes we are wearing are from YOSI SAMRA.